10/21/21 THE DEAD END
Since the last full moon, so much has happened in my life. My Brother passed away, I had a visit from my dad and also went home to see my family in Utah.
Grief, my friends...is such a wild ride. Often, when grief knocks on my door, I just say "no thanks" or I will deal with that later... but this time that wasn't an option.
My whole entire being has felt the loss of my brother's life and the last few weeks it's felt like I have shed a layer of skin. The rawness and newness I am experiencing is so unavoidable and unexpected. Instead of retreating or running from these experiences, I feel I have no choice but to sit with them and ride the waves of pain, loss, fear, self doubt, judgment, relief... and a bittersweet gratitude for my own breath and life. I am learning so much from this loss simply by choosing to be present with it.
Grief always reminds of studying shiatsu in massage school, learning that the foundations of eastern medicine are rooted in the elements, seasons and senses. This time of year, fall... is associated with death and dying, grief and letting go. The organs of the lung and large intestine are governing this time of the year and it’s always good to give them extra support.
In the woods by my house, nature is giving me the annual lesson on decomposition, loss and change. With all of my senses I can feel change happening rapidly. Falling leaves, although beautiful now become compost. The growth on the forest floor withers away and the skeletons of trees become the main attraction.
Nature might be saying to us that this is a time to notice with interested curiosity… what is in our own lives ready to die and wither away so we can see our skeletons more clearly? Can we feel comfortable taking off the masks and images we have created to hide our secrets? If so, what can we learn from sitting with our truth in this way?
Like the forest, maybe there is fungi and moss, jewel colored leaves and even a low golden light changing our perspective... What if all the loss and sorrow is refining the joy and contentment? Loss isn't just loss, it's the process of making room for more life.
Today is the full moon, a time to practice letting go. But not just to close the door on grief, pain, memories... It's about carving out some time to shine a bright light on these things, understand what they have meant to you and intentionally release the energy of that. You might notice a difference of perception, deeper relaxation and even gain new, unexpected insights.
The practices I’m using to support my grief process, I have learned from brilliant teachers who wrote the books we've read over the last year in my online book group Read. Think. Move. Feel!
Here is the list if you’d like to check them out:
Bodyfulness by Christine Caldwell
NeuroSculpting by Lisa Wimberger
Radiant Rest by Tracee Stanley
Trauma and the Unbound Body by Judith Blackstone
To access supplemental content that has been inspired by these books, please join my book group community for free HERE.
In my Mind Body Therapy practice, I teach and facilitate safe, holistic, client centered somatic practices. Mind Body Therapy is a gentle, companion based modality that recognizes we are all whole connected beings with the ability to deepen our understanding of self and find meaning in life’s experiences.